Thursday, June 18, 2020

The Wedding Planner: a guest blog by Annette Dashofy


Dress No. 1
JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: If you've reached a certain age, you've had some sort of hand in a wedding. You planned you own, or your child's. You stuffed almonds in netting for your sister, or arranged your brother's stag party. You drove to pick up the tuxedos, or the out-of-town guests, or the last minute replacement for a bridesmaid's broken shoe.

The point is, weddings are complicated. And people care a lot about how things are done. Now imagine having to organize a wedding for a couple everyone's been waiting seven years to tie the knot... with hundreds of friends and family members giving their opinion every step of the way. Annette Dashofy doesn't have to imagine it - while writing her brand new, just-out Zoe Chambers mystery, Til Death, she lived it.



I have no children, unless you count my cat, so for me, planning a wedding was limited to my own ceremony many, many, many years ago. And then came the impending nuptials for my two main characters, Zoe Chambers and Pete Adams.



I write murder mysteries, not romances, so in Til Death, I thought I could get away with solving the crime and sending the happy couple off to the church with the ceremony happening off the page. My critique partners disagreed. So did my readers when I polled them. They’d been along for this ride through ten books and five short stories and wanted payoff for their loyalty.



Since I’d been on the other end of the question when one of my critique partners married off his two main characters, I couldn’t argue. It would be like having a wedding and not inviting your closest friends and family.



Dress No. 2
Hence, while plotting out murder and mayhem, I also had to plan Zoe’s wedding. What made it fun was thinking about Zoe’s mother. Kimberly. The mother-of-the-bride-from-hell. She would voice her opinion about every aspect of the day, disapproving of Zoe and Pete’s desire to keep it simple. Insisting they wed on Valentine’s Day because of the decorating and photo ops.



I decided on the venue based on my own wedding. Kimberly had already put her foot down about throwing a much grander reception in St. Petersburg, Florida, following the small, intimate gathering Zoe preferred. 




Dress No. 3
Kimberly also disapproved of every dress Zoe tried on, even though Zoe was in Pennsylvania and Kimberly was in Florida. Video conferencing has its downside. Thanks to Pinterest, I was able to do a little virtual “shopping” with Zoe, imagining her trying on gowns and Kimberly’s reactions to them.



Just for the heck of it, I started posting some of the wedding dress photos on my Facebook fan group, Zoe Chambers Mysteries & Friends. I couldn’t believe the variety of opinions posted in the comments. “Love this one!” “Not for Zoe.” “Zoe would hate this!” “This looks just like Zoe.” And those were all from the same picture! I love how invested my readers have become in Zoe’s life, but one of them commented it was like having dozens of Kimberlys judging Zoe’s choices. So true! 




Dress No. 4
All the make-believe wedding planning was a hoot. Until I got to the vows. I fell into the deep hole of writer’s block where the actual ceremony was concerned. There’s a reason I don’t write romance. I didn’t want to have the straight-up traditional wedding service that everyone knows by heart. BORING. Maybe not when it’s your child’s or grandchild’s wedding, but in a mystery novel? BORING. So I let Pete and Zoe write their own vows. I borrowed from a very simple ceremony I found online, and I (hopefully) provided a look into their hearts and souls while offering a smile or laugh for my readers.



You’ll have to read Til Death to decide if I succeeded.



In the meantime, which dress do you think Zoe selected for her big day? 

JULIA: I like all of them, because none of them are a boring strapless tube! Annette's books are available in all the usual locations, but you can support an indy bookstore and get a signed, personalized copy if you order from Mystery Lover's Bookshop!

 
When one of Chief Pete Adams’ first murder convictions is overturned, he and County Detective Wayne Baronick are assigned to reinvestigate the case. As new theories about the murder surface, Pete begins to question not only the original suspect’s guilt, but his own investigative skills from the days when he first took over the Vance Township Police Department.



Did Pete put his personal feelings ahead of his quest for justice and lock up an innocent man? Or is the defendant as devious as Pete first believed?



Meanwhile, Zoe Chambers, Monongahela County’s new chief deputy coroner, struggles with the turmoil of two mysterious deaths—including someone close to her heart—as she tries to master her new job and plan her upcoming wedding.



But her investigation soon links to Pete’s case, making Zoe the target of a killer determined to keep the truth from getting out. Can Zoe see the danger in time, and get to the church for her wedding…alive?

USA Today bestselling author Annette Dashofy has spent her entire life in rural Pennsylvania surrounded by cattle and horses. When she wasn’t roaming the family’s farm or playing in the barn, she could be found reading or writing. After high school, she spent five years as an EMT on the local ambulance service, dealing with everything from drunks passing out on the sidewalk to mangled bodies in car accidents. These days, she, her husband, and their spoiled cat, Kensi, live on property that was once part of her grandfather’s dairy. Her 5-time Agatha-nominated Zoe Chambers mystery series includes Circle of Influence (also nominated for the David Award for Best Mystery), Lost Legacy, Bridges Burned, With A Vengeance, No Way Home, Uneasy Prey, Cry Wolf, Fair Game, Under the Radar, as well as Til Death.

83 comments:

  1. Congratulations on your new book, Annette.
    I can’t imagine trying to please the fans AND Kimberly. Now I’m looking forward to reading the book and getting all the details!
    I like all of the dresses, but I’m choosing dress number three . . . .

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    1. Thanks, Joan. It really is true that you can't please everyone. And in Kimberly's case, there is no pleasing her...EVER!

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  2. It's great to see you on JRW, Annette!

    As a member of Zoe Chambers mysteries and friends group on FB, I agree with you that the reader comments were as varied as the wedding dress choices you posted, lol!

    I have read all 10 books. I think each book was better than the previous one including Til Death (it's a great read everyone!). It has a multi-layered plot and both Zoe and Pete faced both personal and professional challenges. You put them through a lot in the series!

    Although I know the answer, I won't reveal which dress was THE ONE!

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    1. Thanks, Grace. It's always great to be here! I so appreciate your kind words.

      YES, I hope Team Zoe doesn't give away which one is THE dress, at least until later today!

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  3. Yay, Annette! I'm so happy for you. I love #1 but I'm going to let Zoe (I mean you) make the decision (obviously). I can't wait to dive into the book, which is sitting on my coffee table.

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  4. Congratulations Annette. This was a fun journey hanging with Zoe and Pete and this book is next in my queue. Looking forward to reading it all, especially her wedding preparation and Kimberly's reactions. And I like the choice you selected for her wedding dress.

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  5. Congrats once again on the new book Anette!

    I was lucky enough to win the new book over on Wicked Authors earlier this week so I know that I'll be reading the book soon.

    I'm actually lucky enough to have pretty much avoided having to be involved in weddings. I'm single, so no weddings for me. I avoid getting invited to weddings of people as much as possible.

    My sister and brother have each been married three times. For my brother, one was far away and another was done by the town clerk so I wasn't there for either of them. The one I had to go to, I was asked to stand up for him. I did, but knew it was a disaster in the making since the bride was a monstrously awful person. Which she proved.

    For my sister's weddings, one was done quietly with friends so no one was told until after the fact. The most recent one was done in the backyard of their house and that was fine but I just stayed out of the way. The first one I knew would be a disaster. And considering I won the betting pool on how long the marriage would last TO THE DAY, I was right. Plus, I damn near decked the groom in the receiving line to go into the reception for being a Richard Edward. Which you can see on the videotape.

    So in the name of all that is good and just or even just fair to me...NEVER INVITE ME TO A WEDDING! PRETTY PLEASE!!!

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    1. Oh my gosh, Jay! I've only been married once and am still married to the same guy for 37 years now, and I think it's because you weren't at my wedding! Haha!!!

      I hope you enjoy TIL DEATH!

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    2. Wow, 37 years with the same guy sounds great, Annette!

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    3. Jay, I'm thinking you could offer a service to parents wondering if their kid's choice is the right one - invite you to the engagement party, and if you say, "Nuh-uh," they call the wedding off!

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    4. Annette, I'm glad when I hear people I know are getting married and I'm not invited. So much easier for me.

      Julia, but then I'd have to go to a party and that would be a fate worse than death for me.

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    5. Now I'm laughing my head off! No weddings and no engagement parties for Jay!

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  6. Congratulations for Til Death, Annette. I have some catchup to do as I've only read Circle of Influence so far but I will eventually come to it.
    I don't know for Zoe or for Kimberly but for myself the choice would be #3.

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    1. Danielle, honestly, I don't think a bride could go wrong with any of these four gowns. I can't say the same for some of the ones I found while Pinterest shopping.

      And thanks so much!

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    2. Annette, did you see anything like those awful Pnina Tornai dresses (always showing up on "Say Yes to the Dress"? My jaw always drops at them - they look more like Las Vegas show girl costumes than something that would be allowed in a church.

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    3. Julia, I hate to admit I've never seen that show. I did my "shopping" for Zoe on Pinterest, so I just scrolled until I found a dress she (and I) liked.

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  7. Congratulations on the book and wedding, Annette! All the gowns are pretty but I like #1 best!

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  8. Congratulations on your new release and Zoe's wedding! All the gowns are pretty.

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  9. Congratulations on the book, Annette. I think you did a great job with the wedding scene. And yes, there was no way we would have let you send them quietly to the JP off the page!

    Like Grace, I won't divulge THE DRESS. :-)

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    1. Thanks, Liz.

      I have to say, when I began writing murder mysteries, I never expected that writing wedding vows would be part of the job!

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  10. Til Death is here and ready for me to read as soon as I finish the current book. I'm glad you were convinced to include the wedding since I'm looking forward to that as much as the new mystery! All four dresses are beautiful. Maybe #2 for Zoe?

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    1. Thank you, Cindy! I hope you enjoy the mystery AND the wedding!

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  11. I finished 'Til Death last night and loved it, as I have all the books in your series. Zoe and Pete are such interesting characters. I won't say anything about the story details except that I found your resolution of one element of the wedding especially nice. And I can see Zoe in wedding dress #2.

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    1. Thanks, Chris. I feared I might be getting a little sappy, but if you can't get sappy at a wedding, when can you? ;-)

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  12. Annette, I can't believe this is book #10! How did that happen already? And as Grace said, each is better than the last. You are a mystery rock star, dear friend.

    I like #1 and #4 best, but would never presume to decide for a bride. It's her day, by golly.

    I've had the fun of helping two daughters choose wedding gowns, so far. The first daughter announced her engagement by asking me if I'd make her gown, so we shopped first to choose style and details, and then I got to work. That will be 20 years ago next week, and I still have not recovered from the experience, just saying. But her gown was an elegant, flattering silk with a pearl-trimmed fitted bodice and a detachable silk chiffon and charmeuse train. The second daughter's gown was also elegant, but not silk, and not made by me. Her second wedding (five years later, don't ask) took place on the hill above their Virginia home at sunset, and she wore a cute blue and white seersucker summer dress.

    Choosing the cakes was my favorite part of both fancy weddings, to be honest. Did you do any cake tasting on Zoe's behalf? If not, opportunity wasted, Annette! I'm guessing they had chocolate.

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    1. Karen! Cake testing! Darn! I never thought of it! (Plus there was enough angst about the cake in the previous book that I didn't want to revisit a sore subject). For what it's worth, my own wedding cake (back in the dark ages) was white EXCEPT the top tier, which we froze and ate on our first anniversary and which WAS chocolate.

      I bet daughter #1's dress was magnificent. You're a good mom.

      Also, thanks so much for the kind words. HUGS!

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    2. Watch my Facebook page this coming week, if you want to see photos of the gown. It was deceptively simple, with six layers of silk so it would be opaque, and stay wrinkle-free throughout the proceedings, which were outdoors on a HOT, humid day (and it rained partway through).

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    3. I'll keep an eye on your page, Karen!

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    4. I made my sister's wedding dress, but it was a simple thing. It seems to have worked, because they're still married 42 years later.

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    5. I hope Celia can chime in today, because she has a story about making a wedding dress that was an exact reconstruction of an 1840 dress in the MET's Costume Museum. It was also the only wedding dress she ever made, which seems to be a pattern...

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  13. Hi Annette! I'm looking forward to Zoe and Pete's wedding. I'd have to get out my Dungeons and Dragons dice to decide because I like 1, 2, and 3.

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    1. Like I said, you can't go wrong with any of these four. I hope you enjoy the wedding, Cathy!

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  14. What a fun thing to get to do! Why is it so endlessly fascinating to choose wedding dresses? When the whole concept is so kind of… Weird. Sacrificially weird. But I am a big fan of tulle. Just saying. And I can never understand why brides to dresses that are so low cut they cannot even move. well, I guess I understand it. But I… disapprove. :-)
    Annette! 10 books! You are such a rockstar! Yaaay!

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    1. Thank you, Hank! And I've seen your wedding picture. That dress (and you) were amazing!

      I took into account that Zoe is a.) a farm girl b.) marrying her "Prince Charming" and would want to look the part and c.) is better endowed than I am, when selecting her dress. No off the shoulder or sleeveless tops that might result in a wardrobe malfunction and nothing too plain.

      I also agree about tulle. I had a petticoat full of the stuff under my own wedding gown.

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    2. Hank: I totally agree with you on the weirdness of the whole wedding dress thing. Also on the low-cut styles. Call me a prude, but I believe that seeing less is best.

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  15. Annette, welcome to JRW and congratulations on the release of book #10. I have some catching up to do. So, I'm going to start at the beginning and read all 10 asap.
    My choice is #2, but any of the first 3 are lovely.
    Hank, you made me chuckle with the "sacrificially weird" comment. I suppose there are lots of traditions that harken back to primitive beliefs and ceremonies. Whew.
    Jay, I've been in several weddings and all the ones I stood up in have stood the test of time, including, thankfully, my own. LOL.

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  16. Congratulations on your new book, Annette! I pick dress No. 3 -- so elegant.

    I avoided the whole awful wedding planning process by having only 10 days between decision and ceremony, and having a really good friend take charge. I wore linen pants and blouse already in my closet. And we had only a dozen friends present, in our home. A cancer diagnosis was the reason for the way it all unfolded, but it was a very happy day -- after 20 years of living together; and, eight years later, we are both still alive and happy. Yay!

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    1. Congratulations on all of that, Amanda! Especially the "both still alive and happy" part.

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    2. Amanda, that is the best wedding story ever. So happy for you!

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    3. That is a great wedding story with a happy ending, Amanda!

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    4. Amanda, that's the best proof that it's not the ceremony, its the love!

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    5. Amanda, this is a happily ever after story!

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  17. Congratulations on the new book, Annette! I'm only up to Cry Wolf, but the next two are on deck, so I will probably get to Til Death sometime in the early fall. I'm glad that you're letting them get married instead of doing that endless, silly, will-they-or-won't-they dance some editors and TV producers insist on. Marriage brings plenty of conflict, compromises and challenges for any couple.

    I like dress #4, but I figure Pete would marry Zoe in her blue jeans and barn boots. Having Kimberly drop dead from the horror would just be a bonus. I'm sure whatever you put them through on their way to the altar will be just delightful.

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    1. Thanks, Gigi! Yes, I figured out early on that concocting reasons to keep them apart was quickly growing old. Especially when I knew the series was going beyond the initial 3-book contract. And you're right. Marriage is certainly going to give me some new conflicts to explore!

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  18. The new book sounds wonderful, Annette! And it's great to push the boundaries and test your limits with new challenges. My own wedding I didn't plan and didn't wear a fancy dress. But I got to plan with my daughter for her wedding and I loved it. Esp the shopping-for-the-dress part. We went to David's Bridal on Newbury Street in Boston in the aftermath of a blizzard... we were the ONLY people there (we came in by subway.) The dress is gorgeous and she was gorgeous in it. I was so thrilled that she let me share the shopping with her... and believe me I mostly kept my mouth shut because there wasn't a single dress she didn't look adorable in.

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    1. It's not the dress. It's the bride wearing it, Hallie. I'll bet the "private" shopping event was wonderful.

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    2. I did my own dress shopping in DC - with a three month engagement, I didn't have time to fit in more trips to upstate NY to shop with my mom - but when by sister was planning her wedding, we all went. Mom cried. I cried. My sister cried. It was like something out of a Hallmark movie.

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    3. Hallie and Julia, you've made me reminisce about my mother and me shopping for my wedding dress in Cincinnati. Luckily, my mother did speak up when she saw a dress on another girl who was trying it on. The girl didn't take the dress, and my mother suggested I try it. I didn't really want to, but I did, and, of course, it ended up being "the dress" I loved.

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  19. Even though I’ve just started this series, ready for book 4, I can’t say that the wedding news for Zoe and Pete is really a spoiler. I knew they were headed for a committed kind of love. And, thanks to Grace, I now know there’s a fan page I can join.

    Congratulations on the new book, Annette. Oh, and I pick dress #3. It looks like the one Kate Middleton wore when she married Prince William.

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    1. I thought the same thing about that dress, Kathy! And we'd love to have you join Zoe Chambers Mysteries & Friends!

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  20. I seem to have hit this series in the middle, so need to go back and get my boots in order before I read #10! I agree about the wedding--"and they lived happily ever after" is certainly one myth we need to lay to rest! But I'd like to see a relationship that doesn't use the usual boring conflicts, though "did he/she cheat?" etc. As for the dresses, #4 seems a bit to frou-frou for a farm girl. And I agree on the strapless numbers--both the tubes and the 'fairytale princessy' ones--my cousin's daughter is a busty girl and was a blushing bride for more than one reason!

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    1. Oh, dear, Flora!

      As for cheating, thankfully Zoe and Pete have grown well beyond the distrust issues. Life offers enough "interesting" obstacles without falling back on cliches.

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    2. As anyone who's been married for longer than a few years finds out... :-)

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  21. I have sent many brides down the aisle as a member of the altar guild at my church. Long trains are a pain, I always know who hasn't spent much time in our church if the train is long. Less is most definitely more, Hank. Mom used to tell the story of the sexton ringing the bell as the bridal party was entering the church. This was back in the late 60's, early 70's and the lack of bras was definitely not what he expected as the lovely ladies bent to pick up the front of their gowns for the steps. Let's just say it was an eye opening experience. As a heavier chested lady than the models, I like gown number 3. Number 4 is nice but I think it probably has a low back and I hate my back. I haven't met Zoe and Pete yet so I will be adding them to like and see how the wedding turned out. Did Zoe's mom over do the flowers in the church? Oh the stories I could tell you.... I think I may told a story of two before here in JRWs. Congratulations on book number 10. It's 10 right?

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    1. Deana, YES, number 10. I can't believe it either!

      I agree about long trains and short churches. I got married in a small country church and had a train, but definitely not a long one. And it was still a pain to deal with.

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    2. The train I made for my daughter's gown was detachable, and with a few quick snips, it became a lovely shawl in case it turned chilly, since the wedding was outdoors.

      It was hot and steamy, instead, but we still removed the train after the ceremony.

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  22. Annette, what fun! I pick #4--the skirt is so gorgeous. It's a fairy princess dress.
    I had such fun marrying off my own series characters, although Gemma's dress was not a proper wedding dress.

    I did get to help my daughter pick hers, however. She is not a "ruffles" girl, and had her mind made up on the whole "slender column" strapless idea--until she saw "the dress." It was strapless--she has gorgeous shoulders--but the skirt was layers and layers of tulle. We called it the "fluffy" dress and I've never seen such a beautiful bride. Oh, and she wore it with cowboy boots. This is Texas, after all, and it was a ranch venue wedding.

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    1. Deborah, I have no doubt she was gorgeous!

      Zoe didn't wear cowboy boots, although many of my readers felt she should have. I didn't wear them at my wedding either, although my husband did!

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    2. Debs, I've seen photos of brides in fluffy dresses and cowboy boots,and it always looks like the cutest thing ever (and practical, as long as the boots are already broken in!)

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  23. I’m way behind on your series. Have to catch up pronto! We had a simple wedding at my parents’ home. I bought an ivory color mini dress to wear. We had boiled shrimp (that was my job the day before), cheese, crackers, tea sandwiches, champagne, and wedding cake. I have participated in big weddings before but I honestly don’t get all the pageantry and expense.

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    1. Pat, I haven't mentioned it here before, but I used to be a wedding photographer! So, yeah, I've seen big, small, cathedral, and farm weddings. IMHO, the small ones are always the sweeter ones.

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    2. Pat, I have a longstanding theory that's largely borne out by anecdotal evidence: smaller, simpler weddings lead to longer, happier marriages. Not always the case, but by a long shot but there does seem to be a correlation between NOT thinking your wedding day is THE most important day of your life, and having the wherewithal to last through everything life will throw at you together.

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    3. Pat, I'm with you on not being a fan of the "big" wedding. I always think of what that couple could have done with the money they spent on that one single day, like a downpayment on a house. I had a good size wedding, but it was in our church, without any added pageantry. Reception was at the church, too. My daughter had a family and a few friends for her wedding in Key West, where she lived at the time of the ceremony, so not a destination wedding. It was a simple saying of vows at the fort on the beach, and then we all had a lovely supper at a nice restaurant. When she and her husband moved back here later that summer, we had a reception for family and friends who couldn't attend the vows. It was perfect. On the flip side, my beautician had a wedding with eight bridesmaids, a rented hall for reception catered elaborately, and a band from Nashville. Geesh.

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    4. We got married in our small country church and had a small luncheon in the church basement, served by the Ladies Aide. No band. No dancing. No crowds. We'd already bought property and built our house, but we did spend the money we saved doing a small wedding on a week-long honeymoon trip. And that was just to the Poconos. But for us, it felt like a huge luxury.

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  24. Having only been involved in weddings as a groomsman, planning a wedding, especially for fictional characters, scares me. But I love reading about the weddings of the characters I love.

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    1. I think everyone does, Mark! Like Annette says, after seeing the couple through ups, downs, murders and investigations, you want to be there for the payoff! :-)

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    2. I do too, Mark. I just don't want to have to plan any more fictional weddings! :-P

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  25. Annette, welcome to JRW and congratulations on your new book! All beautiful wedding dresses though I admit that the No.3 is my favorite. No idea which dress Zoe picked. I think we met at a mystery conference years ago - Malice Domestic ?

    And I wondered what you wore on your wedding day?

    Diana

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    1. I wrote an answer and it got lost in cyberspace, so here goes again.

      Diana, it's very likely we met at Malice!

      As for my dress, it was very southern belle with 3 tiers of Chantilly lace on the skirt and a ruffle on the bodice. What can I say? It was the early 1980s. There's a photo of me and my new husband on my Facebook personal page in the featured photos section. *sigh* We were babies.

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    2. Annette, your wedding dress sounds lovely. I am not a fan of the modern wedding sausage style dresses. I'll take a gander at your Facebook page. Thank you.

      Diana

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  26. I posted a pic of my daughter in her dress, with the boots, on my author FB page, in the comments for the link to this post.

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    1. She looks gorgeous! Romantic but also fun and personable.

      I can't do an actual html link, but for those of you who want to cut and paste, you can see the photo here:
      https://www.facebook.com/deborah.crombie/photos/p.3228026103914152/3228026103914152/?type=3&theater

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    2. Deborah, she's lovely! And I love that photo!

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  27. Thanks, Julia, and thank you, Annette! Yes, that was one of my favorites from the wedding. It was very casual. Ceremony with family only on the ranch porch, then catered barbecue for the party. A good time was had by all, including the bride and groom. She didn't want a high stress affair.

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  28. For anyone who didn't already know, Dress #1 was the one Zoe picked for her big day. Thanks, everyone, for your guesses and wedding day stories!

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  29. The one I liked best too. Wonder what that means. I'll have to read the book and find out!

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