Jenn McKinlay: I had no idea punctuality was such a big deal, truly, until I wrote a character who was chronically 10-15 minutes late. Annabelle in WAIT FOR IT struggled through the entire book to get to places on time because she was an artist and easily distracted. This was based on my ex-fiance, also an artist and chronically late -- so much so that his father told him he was getting married an hour earlier than he was so my ex would be on time. We were still late.
Y'all, I had NO IDEA this was such a trigger for so many people. The negative reviews I received were all about Annabelle's inability to be on time and how it made her unlikable. Readers, simply could not get over it and I was like -- but you weren't even waiting for her! LOL.
I remember being at the hairdresser's on my wedding day and my mom got all in a fizz that we were going to be late and she was about to cancel her appointment. This was a strong indication that Mom is an "on time is late" sort of person. I was in the chair with my updo half done and I said, "I'm pretty sure they can't start without me. Sit down. Get your hair done. We're fine." She did and we were...right on time.
 |
| Someone is having a stroke reading this - guaranteed. |
These days I live in a house divided. Hub and Hooligan 1 are "early is on time" sorts, while I arrive precisely on time. I don't like to be early or late and schedule my life accordingly. Naturally, Hooligan 2 is always late just to keep our family events lively. Seriously, the tardy hotline at his high school called our house every evening to let us know he was late...again. In all fairness though, he has gotten better since leaving the nest. Somewhat.
I do have one friend who I meet regularly for coffee and we have an understanding that we meet at 10-ish. This means any time between 15 minutes before 10 or 15 minutes after. We're both readers so we always have a book on hand and neither one of us minds reading our book while we wait. Sometimes if the book is really good, I hope she arrives at 10:15 so I can get some reading in. LOL.So, how about it, Reds and Readers, which type are you?
Early is on Time.
On Time is Late.
I'll See You When I See You.
Hhhmmm . . . I never actually gave this much thought. I guess I'm a combination of "on time" and "early is on time." I'm okay with being a bit early; on time is good; late requires a really good excuse . . . .
ReplyDeleteVery reasonable, Joan.
DeleteI try to be on time but tend to be early and get annoyed if I have to wait!
DeleteMy ex always had to be early for everything, like the first ones there early. I'm the early is on time type mostly but not as bad as my ex. I also carry a book with me where ever we go so I'm never bored when I show up say at an appt. early.
ReplyDeleteHaving a book is key!
DeleteThis post made me laugh. My husband and I are complete opposites - or were. We've sort of conditioned each other over the years. I used to be reliably 10 minutes late. I don't know why 10 minutes, but it always seemed to be that way. Meanwhile, he was pretty reliably 30 minutes early. Being an engineer, he'd start counting backwards before we left for wherever we were going, and he usually overcompensated, so, we often ended up walking around the block several times before a movie started, or waiting in the car at the curb for half an hour before a dinner/party rather than spring "way early" on the host/hostess. (They really don't appreciate that.)
ReplyDeleteThese days we are both closer to "on time". I tend to arrive now about 5 minutes early, and so does he.
I feel like ten minutes late is completely acceptable. Thirty minutes early would make me bonkers.
DeleteI so agree. Deep in my heart I can tell I'm still a ten minutes late gal.
DeleteJenn, I don't even know how you pull off exactly on time! So funny.
ReplyDeleteI describe myself as chronically early (except to dinner parties). I just really, really hate being late. I haven't missed a plane since I forgot about the time change while in grad school.
My best friend is always, always late. Last month, she - after 46 years of friendship - described why. "I'm so in the moment, I get lost in what I'm doing. That's why I'm always late." It makes perfect sense. And I am the ultimate planner, always looking ahead. Very un-Zen of me, I realize.
It might only be in my mind - as the Hub insists that on time is late :)
DeleteYou would have to be from the Sow uth to really appreciate this one...
DeleteThis is wonderful topic, Thanks Jenn. I'm going to use it at the next family get together.
ReplyDeleteI'm uncomfortable if I don't arrive early (owing to a once-upon-a-time career in radio and TV where you can't be late when the "on air" light illuminates). These days, if lateness is unavoidable--think Boston traffic--I expect a heads-up text at least ten minutes before the meeting time.
Oh, that should be lively! LOL. We have a family event today. Hub will try to be early and I will refuse to budge until I know we'll be right on time.
DeleteI like to arrive at least 15 minutes before I'm scheduled to be there.
ReplyDeleteVery reasonable, Dru, but too early for me. I could do 5 minutes early if pressed.
DeleteYou made me smile Jenn. It is such a touchy subject.
ReplyDeleteI’ve always been « early is on time » but as I get older, I more and more adjust to situations.
While travelling, it is important to be early otherwise I become very anxious.
If I’m invited for dinner, I try to be just on time even if I’m the first to arrive.
But if I’m invited to one of my sisters, I tend to arrive late and it is never late enough because she never is ready. I even eat before going because I know I’ll be hungry before we go to the table.
Of course I never get out without a book to keep me company.
Danielle
LOL - I had a neighbor who would invite us to inner at 6 and we'd be fed at 9. Drove me crazy.
DeleteI grew up in a household where we always had to be early. Being late was considered a huge disrespect by my parents & that habit has stuck with me.
ReplyDeleteSo I arrive 10-15 minutes before the scheduled time. Yesterday, I arrived 10 minutes before my 11:00 am appt in Montreal. My advisor was 20 minutes late. Good thing I had an audiobook with me!!
I think that's why I arrive right on time. I don't like waiting for people unless there an agreed upon buffer.
DeleteVery touchy subject, indeed!
ReplyDeleteI try to be bang on time. However, inevitably, last-minute events keep me from that goal. Every darned time. My husband, instead of turning off lights and locking doors, or putting stuff in the car, will just sit somewhere, messing around while I get ready to leave. I wish I had a quarter for every time I am ready to leave, then have to hunt for him to go. Even if I lock doors before I start getting cleaned up, he will have unlocked at least one. Or I'll discover his car his behind mine, or that he changed into something inappropriate. Or something.
You'd think by now I'd catch on and tell him we need to leave earlier than we do. I can't bring myself to do that. He's a grownup, right?
Peeve of mine, too, Karen! I'm all set and out the door at the agreed-upon time, and he's still getting ready. Or he gets to the car and forgot X. Grrr.
DeleteOh boy, Karen and Edith. I think that is a not so subtle way to control a situation. Even though Irwin likes to be early, he will be doing something unnecessary to our departure (reading the paper) instead of helping while I run around making sure everything in the house is all set. For instance, the kitchen garbage was still there (cannot describe smell here) when we returned from a 2 week trip to Alaska because that was the one thing I asked him to do, and he likes to take it out at the last minute but forgot.
DeleteOkay, that would bug me more than the constant nudge I get to leave earlier.
DeleteOne of my friends wrote his first novel every evening, in the time between when his wife SAID she would be ready, and when she actually WAS ready to go out. I love that about him!
ReplyDeleteThat is hilarious! I think :-)
DeleteLOLOLOLOL. I love it.
DeleteAnnabelle is one of my very favorites of your characters. WAIT FOR IT is one of my favorite books ever, especially the audiobook version. And, I am never late. She was completely loveable. She was a rules breaker. I rarely break rules. I just loved the character. What is with some people??!
ReplyDeleteWe are never late except - traffic happens. If we are expected some place, and have to drive on a highway, we get an early start. Irwin is always ready to leave before I am, but I am on time or early. I bring books to all appointments and always have one available on my phone. We have friends whom we dine out with frequently. They are rarely on time. That is annoying, but not Annabelle.
Oh, my, yes, the actor who read Nick's part - mercy, he was HOT! I needed a fan and a bucket of ice. LOL.
DeleteI was definitely raised as "early is on time". My dad got so annoyed with anyone being late. Towards the end of their lives, I used to bring dinner once a week. My cell phone would start buzzing when i was 2 minutes out, 5 minutes before I was supposed to be there. I found that annoying!
ReplyDeleteI also had a job where you could not arrive late, because you had to take over for someone else. If my first schedule slot as a dispatcher was Net 2 (police radio channel), I better plug in right at 7 am, because my night shift co-worker was waiting to leave. Of course if something major was going on which needed a big explanation, there could be a longer overlap. I got in the habit of always getting to work early, and would be very annoyed if I wasn't relieved on time. As a supervisor, I got to be the tardy police. In an effort to be consistent, we had a tardy book, where we kept track of who was late, how late, and what the excuse was--as you might imagine, the employees were on board with this idea, NOT! Still, it was better than being the perfume police (fragrance free workplace) and having to sniff out the offenders.
I'm more relaxed now, and don't usually arrive right on the dot to social events. My Latino friends have also taught me to be a bit more flexible, as their culture is generally more relaxed about time.
I like to be on time, and like even more to be a little early – shades of my father and grandfather – NEVER be late even if you have to pace for a while before you leave.
DeleteHowever, he who harumphs goes into slow mode when there is a clock involved and I am sure thinks that he should make an entrance, when I am also sure everyone just wants to throttle him. This also comes up when something happens and we need to hurry. He goes into stunned mode or something, and you cannot break it.
Case in point – pregnant, water broke, over an hour from hospital in Montreal, 3am. Get in car – well poured me into car semi-naked actually. Pat the cat goodbye. Pat the dog goodbye. Drive. Look at trees (it is dark), discuss about taking side roads instead of trans Canada, comment on trucks in truck stop, discuss which bridge to take into the city, take strange streets to nowhere, THEN gun-her to the hospital, suddenly in a panic.
I had the rest of the kids by c-section – it was scheduled. He nearly missed them…
There are definitely cultural differences - the SW does operate on its own time. It's 115 here today - everyone is moving slowly.
DeleteI will trade you 10 degrees C of heat and a sight of the sun for 3 weeks of fog and rain, tho thankfully not as much as the US east states are getting. Trying to plant the geraniums which now have mildew on them before I have to pull them up for the fall!
DeleteWe reached 110 in the Bay Area this afternoon. It is still above ninety degrees at almost ten pm. We never have that much time without the sun. We have 330 sunny! days a year here.
DeleteI have been an on time person my whole life, but that was reinforced by marrying an Army officer who thought early was on time was the way to go. I think that West Point was the reason for that! We are now retired and on time is usually only important for appointments, but I still don’t like to be late to anything.
ReplyDeleteBeing late does make me uncomfortable. I don't like to keep people waiting.
DeleteThanks Jenn - great discussion. I am an always late person. My husband (ex-Navy) is always on time or ahead of time.
ReplyDeleteWhich brings me to a couple of q's. Should you arrive fashionably late to a dinner party or social event? What if you arrive early to a dinner invitation (at someone's home) and they are still getting ready?
I was like your Hooligan - my high school history teacher was very nice about me coming in late pretty much every day. He would comment but never reported me.
Oh, I would never arrive early for a dinner party. That is so much pressure on the hostess… At 7 o’clock dinner party? I am there at 5 or 10 after. That’s on time to me.
DeleteOops, hit enter too soon. But it’s a needle to thread, because 715 is too late. That throws off the schedule of the hostess completely. So right in that sweet spot of between five and 10 after the appointed hour. What do you others all think?
DeleteOh, never arrive to a dinner party bang on the hour. Having been the hostess grateful for those final minutes of prep time, I'd never deny someone else the chance for that last swipe through the kitchen. When I send out invites to my dinners, I always do it the old-fashioned way, "6 for 6:30" or, for, say Christmas dinner, "2 for 3," because there are twenty to thirty people and they need lots of time to mingle.
DeleteThat formula give guests the time to shoot for - if you get here at 6, you get a cocktail, but if you arrive at 6:30, you're sitting down to eat right away.
Good questions. I think Hank nailed it. 5-10 is the sweet spot.
DeleteSince I am diabetic, I usually say we eat at 6. Usually meals are informal - dress code - please wear something; so I can deal with things knowing the meal will be served at 6. Not here on time - too bad, we are eating. Come too early - drink code is bring your own, so no worry about serving those. Please leave at 9 - I am fed up with people by then! (since I am always the designated cooker - my rules - deal with them.
DeleteThe difficulty is with the host who is “an early is on time” and the guest who allows that 5-10 minutes making things too hot or too cool for eating when guest arrives. Elisabeth, who believes and strives for early is on time.
DeleteI like to be on time, which means I am early but I don't go in the door until the precise time. When I was teaching I showed up extremely early, which was nice to have the place and the quiet mostly to myself. Somehow I could never get there before one young woman, who always showed up with wet hair, straight out of the shower, I presume.
ReplyDeleteBut mostly I like to be early so I can get a good parking spot!
P.S. Jenn, Sorry to say I never even noticed about Annabelle being late. Or maybe I noticed, but it really didn't mean anything to me other than that is who she is.
I always have a book, too, so I never mind waiting for you!
Yes, there is always something to do while we’re waiting, right? Especially with phones!
DeleteThank you for "getting it", Judi. Honestly some of the reviews were hilarious. YOu'd think Annabelle kept the reader waiting. LOL.
DeleteWhile I try to be on time, various things can delay so that you wind up late. There are things I purposefully get to early but again, that is something very specific to a given situation. I'd say I'm a catch-all type for this particular affliction.
ReplyDeleteBy the way, football coaches do this thing all the time. Tom Coughlin (Giants and Jaguars) did it that way. If you showed up on time, you were late, etc. And Bill Belichick...man, if you showed up late...he just sent you home. Even in a heavy New England snowstorm.
I can see coaches hardlining about that. At H2's new job (barista) if they're late (even one minute) more than 4 times in 6 months, they're fired. It has been very good for him!
DeleteI like to arrive a few minutes early. Prior to retirement, I was an officer of the court and judges don’t appreciate tardiness with a busy docket. I also taught college classes and I like extra time to set things up, materials, laptop, screen etc. It sets a poor example when the teacher is late all the time. I was have been delayed due to weather, that sort of thing is unavoidable.
ReplyDeleteThe court system seems like it would be unforgiving.
DeleteMy court system experience was generally different…if court was to begin at 10 for most judges 1015 to 1020 was okay for THEM to arrive…but woe betide the clerk, stenographer, translator, attorney, or litigant that arrived at 1016 or 1021! LOL. Elisabeth
DeleteYeah, the court doesn't like anyone being late. But they have no problem wasting our time all day long if they feel like it.
DeleteI am the perennial early bird who strives to be on time and not to hate the person I'm waiting for. And when I teach I always start ON TIME and finish on time. I think it's disrespectful to the people who show up promptly to wait for latecomers.
ReplyDeleteI would have loved it if some of my professors appreciated that I had other classes to get to. Oy!
DeleteAbsolutely agree Hallie. Elisabeth
DeleteThis is completely hilarious, and I am so shocked at the negative reviews! It’s fiction!
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I think it depends on the occasion. For a book event, or a plane flight, or an appointment of any kind, I am definitely early. (I go to the airport ridiculously early.)
If I am the main speaker or interviewer or on a panel, I am at least half an hour early. I have been known to wait in the car for a while before I go in because I was so early, and I am very happy with that.
I learned over all my television years, there is absolutely nothing worse than being late.
In fact, and thinking about this now, I have actual stress dreams about being late. There is nothing worse than that in television. Most of my stress dreams are about being late. And I wake up so relieved that it’s a dream.
But If we are going out to dinner with pals, same eating at a restaurant, I am a tiny bit less frantic about it… If someone, including me, is five or 10 minutes late, that can happen. I don’t like it, but it doesn’t freak me out.
We have friends who are absolutely incredibly always late, And and I can’t figure out why they can’t get it together, you know? But we are flexible when it comes to others.
Oh, and pet peeve. When someone is late, I absolutely hate to hear the excuses. Just don’t tell me. Traffic, kids, car whatever, I don’t need to know. Just acknowledge it, say you’re sorry, and move on.
What a wonderful topic, Jenn !
Hank, I am so not surprised that you have thought about the many aspects of punctuality! LOL.
DeleteWell, that went on longer than I had planned :-). Sorry! Xxx
ReplyDeleteOh, completely different subject: I made a hotel reservation for NE Crime Bake. Will do registration soon!!
ReplyDeleteYAY!!! Can't wait to see you.
DeleteJenn, YOU are going to be at the Bake, too? What a treat!
DeleteI think we need a JRW party that weekend! Let's see if it is something we can plan!
DeleteYay, fabulous news, Judy!!
DeleteI was born early--way early--and have been mostly early to everything since. I don't plan it that way, it just seems to happen. (Flora)
ReplyDeleteOh, I never thought of a possible correlation to birth time...hmmm. H2 did have to evicted out of the womb, come to think of it.
DeleteI have always been "I'll see you when I see you," and I apologize to everyone I've kept waiting! Like Annabelle in WAIT FOR IT, I am easily distractable, and, well, seem to be lacking a natural sense of how long things take. It didn't matter too much when I was younger; for thirty years my husband, an early-is-late kind of guy, managed to keep the trains running on time despite me (although our kids did get an awful lot of tardy notices...)
ReplyDeleteWhen Ross passed away, I realized I needed to put my big girl pants on and make myself responsible for being punctual. I literally sought out help on how to do this, from my friends (and organizational wizards) Celia Wakefield and Jessica Ellicott. And you know what? After using their strategies for the past 3 to 4 years, it's working!
My daughters and I went to southern Virginia in early May, a trip involving driving to the bus station, getting a bus to Logan Airport, taking the plane to DC, renting a car, and stopping at my sister's for a blow-up bed. The girls kept asking, "Who are you and where is our mother?" when we made every stop with plenty of time. No anxiety, no running. Does it come naturally? No. It involves a lot of pre-planning, setting alarms on my phone, and adding in a memorized amount of buffer time. But it can be done!
Look at you, Julia! Being all organized and whatnot! *High five*
DeleteIf I don’t arrive at least fifteen minutes ahead of time( thirty is even better), I feel like I’m late. And I have friends and relatives who have never grasped the concept of “arriving on time”. To them, arriving on time means getting there the same day!! I could tell you stories about them.
ReplyDeleteAt least I always have a book or my Kindle with me.
DebRo
The same day???? Ack!
DeleteJenn, this is a great post. I try to be on time if I can. I often comment late here on JRW because I sleep in the mornings.
ReplyDeleteTo my surprise I got up earlier than usual this morning in time to read a post about Being Late. LOL
Diana
How meta, Diana!
DeleteI tend to be about 5-10 minutes late to in time. I do my best but it’s just hard to get everyone going on time in my family.
ReplyDeleteWhen the whole family is involved, it's an entirely different game.
DeleteI’ve pretty much been an early is on time and on time is late person, except for when the children were small and on their own time tables. I definitely do not like to be late to anything. I wouldn’t be perturbed by a book character’s chronic tardiness.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Brenda :) And, yes, children change everything.
DeleteThere's one situation that I think hasn't been mentioned, that many of us had to cope with for years. (And some still do, I'm sure.)
ReplyDeletePicking up the kid at daycare. Being late was NOT negotiable. And when we were late, we were in serious trouble with everyone. And rightly so. Those overworked underpaid child care workers needed to get home too.
Whew! Even my grandkids are now out of daycare.
Oh, yes, I lived in fear of Mrs. McElrath who ran the preschool. We were never late to pick up.
DeleteI used to be chronically early for everything. I couldn’t stand the thought of being late. I also didn’t have as many things going on. I worked one job. I didn’t own a house. I didn’t have any pets. As I got older, something changed. Life got busier. I bought a house and got pets that need to be let out between work and evening events. I started working multiple jobs to pay for everything. A dog will throw up on something right as I’m leaving for work. And I somehow always underestimate the amount of time it will take for me to get somewhere. I’m usually right on time. At work, I’m walking into the building on the dot. (I have a salaried job and get there well before I need to interact with any customers. My job also requires me to stay late often to get the work done and I’m much better at staying until the work is done than I am at getting there early.) It is rare for me to get to anything early. I’m usually right on time for most things and I’ve become okay with showing up to parties fashionably late instead of while the host is still getting things ready.
ReplyDeleteExactly. On the dot is my preferred time for everything.
DeleteMy father was an airline pilot. His world view was firmly in the early is on time. He couldn't afford to be late for a flight.
ReplyDeleteI've mellowed somewhat since then.
My children however, will be late for their own funerals.
LOL!!! I have one of those children!
DeleteFrom Celia: I grew up with on time is late parents, but that’s enough about them! However it was bred in me and I have had to work at polite lateness. I agree with Julis etc, I’m always pleased when my guests are a little late for dinner and on moving to Maine have had to up my game. Very one here verges on early. Clients now, punctual was imperative as I was working with disorganized folk. So picture me bombing up the NY Thruway, getting lost and arriving an hour late. Yes I had called. On arrival the client told me not to worry as he was militantly disorganized and considering a different approach. But my star turn was newly married we were returning to England for a visit. I was organized and packed. We walked to the East Side bus terminal for JFK - so early! As we sat waiting I found I wasn’t wearing my engagement ring. Victor left me, returned to our apartment, got the ring and retuned to me with plenty of time to spare. I have tried to internalize that experience but I’m still early for planes etc except for the one time I arrived on time in Nairobi to find the plane we were taking had some issues and the only othe plane available had fewer seats which were all full so we had missed our flight on our way to a beach wedding in Malindi. The staff were sooo helpful and got us via later plane to Mombasa then a taxi for a two hour drive over dreadful roads to Malindi. But we got there as planned and missed nothing. It was a wonderful wedding and Safari. Wish I could return to Kenya again. Not sure what the moral is actually.
ReplyDeleteI realize I have lateness-panic dreams involving traveling (well, all my nightmares involve traveling). But the ones where I'm at the airport and my passport is an hour away at home and the plane is leaving (usually for China) are pretty bad.!
DeleteI think the moral (if I can be so presumptuous) is that punctuality is great but flexibility is critical.
DeleteI love this, Jenn! I used to be a chronically late person. I put this down to my dyslexic-related poor time management skills... But I have improved in later life, and am now one of those people who likes to arrive at the airport three hours early!
ReplyDeleteOh, wow, I thought I was solid at two hours! I won't even do a layover that's less than an hour and a half. I remember I used to take the 20 minute layover option and think I was fine. LOL.
DeleteEarly, on time, or late? It depends. Early for appointments and flights. On time for meeting people. A little late, 10 to 20 minutes, for parties. My husband and I are not in sync on this. I may be ready to leave only to find out he hasn't started getting ready yet. Or the opposite with me dragging my feet.
ReplyDeleteI've noticed when I don't want to go somewhere I delay getting ready. My favorite plans are canceled plans :)
DeleteJenn, your story of reviewers freaking out because of a fictional character's lateness just crack me up. Talk about taking things personally! I've struggled with time management all my life, so of course I married someone who's chronically way early. Like Debs, I attribute my inability to be on time to dyslexia, ADD, and other brain quirks. I recently read a quote from James Wiley, MD that perfectly describes my situation: "ADHD brains are fast ... but the steering is difficult and the brakes are lousy." Amen, brother!! ~Lynda
ReplyDeleteOMG, Lynda, that it a perfect description!
DeleteI’d like to show up on time or maybe 5 minutes early. Too early could put a burden on the host because they’re not prepared for you to be there yet or your reservation is not available yet. Me being late makes me crazy so it is possible if I get some place too early I will just sit in my car until five minutes before. I have solve the problem of my friends being late because most of them always are by requiring them to come and pick me up then I can just keep doing things at home until they decide to get there and I don’t feel anxious just sitting around in public waiting for somebody to show up.
ReplyDeleteBrilliant! An excellent compromise.
DeleteI used to have a horrible boss, whose desk you had to walk by to get into our work area. As people would arrive, she'd be standing at her door, and she'd dramatically look at her watch as each person came in. Early, on time, late, didn't matter. She apparently just wanted to show us how much power she had. I still get angry, thinking about it! :-)
ReplyDeleteOh, yeah, a friend of mine had a boss like that - drunk on power. To me that's the first thing that should get a person kicked out of management. Not fit to serve!
DeleteFive minutes early is on time. That's my mantra! I am chronically early. So much so I will sometimes sit in the car and read to be acceptably on time.
ReplyDeleteWhich is why books are my constant companions!
DeleteThis is Kim. After living in Swizerland 35 years, I have become very Swiss about punctuality. This means: To people’s dinner parties, be exactly on time, and if you are going to be more than ten minutes late you call and apologize. At work events, especially meetings, you have to be sitting in your seat with your coffee in front of you because the first speaker will start on the dot. It wasn’t really hard for me to adapt to these social rules—they weren’t that different from the way my parents behaved.
ReplyDeleteFascinating. Although, they are known for the timepieces so...
DeleteYup. That's why Hub is always early. It's how he controls the uncontrolable (or tries to).
ReplyDeleteI am chronically, always late. My mother said I was born late and nothing changed. I used to be on time to classes and work, but in later years, I was frequently 5-10 minutes late to work. I believe that was some kind of subconscious, rebellious thing with me and bosses…. My mother-in-law was German (as in from Germany German) and very much of the early is on time school. What frustrated me is that my husband, when visiting his folks without me, would be on time if not early. But there were plenty of times I was waiting for HIM and we’d end up late. He was in the clear because it was obviously Pat who was the one who was late! — Pat S.
ReplyDeleteI generally am slightly early for most things. Of course going to someone else’s home I want to be on the dot because I wouldn’t want to rush them.
ReplyDeleteNow for family trips, we have 3 people that are ready to go on time and 1 Last Minute Lucy. So I often am herding her and checking all the things that need to be checked when leaving.
Jenn, I'm wondering whether many of the people who were so vexed by Annabelle's tardiness (and her lack of remorse about it) were expressing their feelings toward someone in their family circle who had acted in the same way. It may have been easier for them to say, "Annabelle is so selfish!", or, "How rude of Annabelle", than to make the same accusations toward their mother, who left them hanging so many times, or embarrassed them in front of friends or classmates. The tardy people often see themselves as free spirits while the people in their circle live with uncertainty, embarrassment, occasional worry, and so much frustration.
ReplyDelete