SOMETHING'S FISHY

JENN McKINLAY: There was a murder in our house this week. Or so I thought. 

The origin story: Way back in October, Hooligan 1 and his Plus 1 arrived at our house with a sad looking goldfish that Plus 1 had won at a carnival game at October Fest. They already had their quota on critters, so Hub and I happily adopted the little fish, naming it Shohei Ohtani because Hub's beloved Dodgers were in the World Series.

Surprisingly, our cats all ignored little Shohei...well, all except one.

Tig was rather obsessed with Shohei and liked to "help" me feed him. For his part, Shohei didn't seem to mind the chonky cat, as if knowing Tig couldn't reach him and his life was such an upgrade from carnie life that he frequently did zoomies around his tank and was a talented rapper, his fave being Eminem's Lose Yourself (see video - which I hope managed to capture the audio).

Fast forward to this week, Hub and I left the menagerie to play in our weekly volleyball league (where we froze but that's another blog post). Tig had "helped" me feed Shohei before we left and I thought nothing of it. 

When we arrived home, I went to switch off the tank light but little fish did not come to rap at me. Huh. I looked to see if he was hiding in his house. Nope. There was no sign of him. Little Shohei was GONE and there was no sign of a struggle. The tank was intact, no water anywhere, nothing. 

I was distraught. Shohei had brought me much joy over the past few months and I adored him.

I wanted to know what happened to him, but there was absolutely no evidence. Still I had my suspicions...my "helper" Tig must have done it! Hub pointed out the impossibility of the cat opening the tiny food door, grabbing the fish, and closing the food door without making a mess but I was still unconvinced. I mean look at this face. It has apex predator all over it!

I called Hooligan 1 and he was very sweet about the loss. When I talked to my mom the next morning she suggested the "fish rapture" might have taken Shohei. LOL. I kept giving Tig a side eye, wondering if he'd burp up some fish bones. He did not.

Then Hooligan 2 stopped by with his Plus 1 (they'd snagged me a cupcake to help push through my deadline) and I told them the story of the mysterious disappearance. They were also sad (we all adored Shohei). And then Hooligan 2 said, "Mom, he's in the bottom of his cave. Very dead."

What?! I went racing over to check and sure enough there he was. Y'all, I checked that tank with a flashlight. He was not in there! I have no idea where little dude was hiding his dead self for 24 hours, but he managed it. This morning, I buried him in our backyard pet sematary cemetery with a simple somber service. 

Now here's the take away: This is exactly how people believe an innocent person did something that they didn't do! I was thinking with my heart and not my head, looking for a culprit when it was natural causes (in my defense if Shohei's body had been visible from the beginning, we could have avoided all of the unpleasantness, but I digress). For what it's worth, I profusely apologized to Tig for all of the dark looks I sent his way and gave him extra treats. "When I'm wrong, I say I'm wrong." (Who knows what movie that quote is from?).

Anyway, anyone else misjudge their pet as badly as I did? Or have a goofy pet story to share? Happy Friday!