RHYS BOWEN: I’m in the process of looking for an outfit to wear to the Edgars Banquet, so this has me thinking about what not to wear. My worst fashion errors of the past. At least twice a year I go through my wardrobe and remove things I haven’t worn. Sometimes I look at a garment and ask myself why I ever thought it would look good on me. That pale mauve? Those frills? That top that balloons out like a maternity garment? What was I thinking?
Over the years I have had my share of cringe-worthy outfits. When I was a teen I remember tights were in fashion. I wore bright green tights with a short green pleated skirt and a green cardigan, worn backward to show a low back and high front. I think I looked like a teenage version of the jolly green giant! Those cardigans worn backward were still fashionable in my first year of college and I wore one to a dance.
Also in college I made my own ballgown from some lovely apricot brocade my mother gave me. It was quite risque… tiny spaghetti straps, but low cut, and very form hugging. I hadn’t quite finished it by the day of the ball so my friends had to SEW ME INTO IT. Thank heavens I didn’t have a date who tried to get too fresh and remove it! (I had to be cut out of it afterward)
After that I tried hot pants. Very short mini skirts. Very long flowery hippie dresses, but a couple of occasions stand out:
I was invited to a wedding in England back in the seventies. (I was living in California) I wore a light, flowery two piece outfit, quite suitable for a US wedding. It was a brisk day and everyone else was in a sensible, plain daytime suit. I felt like a peacock who had fallen into a hen house.
The other time that happened, and the worse so far: my then agent hosted a cocktail party for me at the Frankfurt book fair. To meet our European agents. Heady, right? John told me i should stand out and look like the guest of honor. I saw this emerald green silk pajama outfit–wide leg trousers and mandarin jacket. Tres stylish. I felt good in it until I walked into the room and EVERYONE ELSE WAS IN BLACK. EVERY WOMAN IN THE LITTLE BLACK DRESS. And I was the guest of honor so I couldn’t sneak away or hide behind the potted palms. I still get hot around the collar when I think of it. (makes note not to do that at the Edgars this year). Luckily I have no photos to share.
The only other real faux pas I can think of is when I decided to cut my own bangs, but we won’t go into that.
So Reds, confession time. When have you asked yourself WHAT WAS I THINKING?
LUCY BURDETTE: I have LOTS of these, but I bet you were stunning in the green silk pj’s Rhys! I’m thinking of a dress I just gave away. It was strapless with a sweetheart neckline, tight to the waist, then a flared short skirt with a net underskirt. It was pink, with black polka dots and a rhinestone flourish at the cleavage line. Do you get the picture? I wore it to a dinner dance years ago when I’d just met John. One of my sisters-in-law asked if I was going to the prom! (So rude.
I gave it to the Woman’s Club used clothing booth last weekend and it was INSTANTLY snatched up:)
RHYS: Lucy I had the same thing happen to me once. I snapped up a strapless dress with full skirt and wore it to a functon of some sort. A woman saw me and exclaimed, "Oh my God. I haven't seen a dress like that since the junior prom." At the time I was hurt. Now I would have examined her and said, "And I bet you couldn't fit into one like this even back then." No longer s shrinking violet.
HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN: Yes, Lucy, that would be very hot right now. And I bet you looked great. But you were absolutely right to let that go–it’s definitely a “wear it once” kind of dress.
Me? Well, I stand by my choices, for the time, even though I still cringe. It was 1971, in Washington DC, and I went to a very fancy (cocktail time) wedding in a lavender hot pants suit, (you know, shorts, and a tailored short jacket, very businesslike except it was…shorts.) with white tights and pale loden green shoes. It was BEAUTIFUL and stylish– and outrageously wrong. I thought–I cannot change clothes, so ‘Ill brazen this through. It was a lesson in confidence, that’s for sure.
ANd I got sent home from high school the day before graduation–we all wore our graduation dresses to class, and mine was a very Mary Quant minidress, all white lace, SO pretty and sexy-sweet, which is not what they love in high school, of course. And since when I put my hands to my sides the hem was shorter than my fingertips, I was OUT. I remember thinking–fine, send me home, who cares, you’re not gonna expel me on graduation day.
DEBORAH CROMBIE: Oh, so many bad choices. I seem to have a knack for not ever getting things quite right. (And getting my picture taken wearing said bad choices.) But what immediately came to mind, maybe because my daughter's godmother has recently reminded me of it, is the raspberry pink velour maternity jogging suit. Okay, I am 5' 2", and I gained mumble-mumble WAY too much weight with my pregnancy, AND my lovely daughter was more than two weeks late. Just picture me waddling around like a hot pink raspberry stuffed with a beachball. Nuff said.
JENN McKINLAY: Punk rocker here. Nothing can be worse than my bleached blonde faux-hawk, combat boots, and black peacoat that I wore all through my senior year of high school. Thankfully, my mom negotiated that I save the bleaching and faux-hawking until after senior pictures were taken. After that episode, everything is fine.
HALLIE EPHRON: I’m such a conservative dresser I really can’t think of anything I deliberately acquired that was… questionable.I do remember the time we took a family trip to Cuttyhunk, a small island in accessible only by passenger ferry (no cars on the island back then) and without a single actual store. Jerry and I packed food, pampers, beach toys… everything we needed for a week, but we left our suitcase with all of our clothes at home. So for a week we wore the same clothes over and over again plus sheet/togas while we did laundry, and we went swimming in our underwear. It was an exercise in minimalism.
RHYS : So your turn Reddies. Which outfits still make you go hot when you remember wearing them?
Like Hallie, I've always been a very conservative dresser, so I can't think of anything particularly outrageous that I wore . . . .
ReplyDeleteOh yeah, I clearly remember the worst dress I wore for my grade 9 graduation ceremony.
ReplyDeleteThis was 1981, I was 15 years old and was in a romantic flowery fashion phase.
So, the fabric I chose was a huge Laura Ashley floral print in mauves and beige. The top had a sweetheart neckline which emphasized my broad shoulders.
I should have known this was a bad mistake since my mom hesitated to make the dress.
She rarely refused to make me an outfit. But she asked me multiple times whether I was sure.
YES, I insisted.
So, there are several photos of me in that dress with a huge grin on my face. My arms are laden with multiple awards which included the award certificate & the following (heavy) book prizes:
New Geographical Dictionary (geography), Roget's Theasaurus (English/typing).
P.S. I learned my fashion faux pas lesson & asked my mom to sew a very nice outfit for my grade 13 graduation ceremony in 1985. I wore a claret red silk de chine dress, and black blazer. Solid colours!
The McCall's pattern she used for that hideous dress looked similar to this:
Deletehttps://www.etsy.com/ca/listing/1895974143/vintage-1980s-laura-ashley-womens-dress?
I had several dresses like that, Grace! Including a simple white cotton floor-length that was my wedding dress (small family-only wedding). I loved the style.
DeleteOooh, I forgot to mention there were huge RUFFLES along that sweetheart neckline not evident in the McCall pattern link I provided.
DeleteTruly, what was I thinking?! SIGH
Grace, I too had several Laura Ashley-style dresses. But I am 5'10" and mostly they were in solid colors, including white and floor-length, like Edith, for my wedding dress in 1984. I once shared on FB a photo of my best friend and me, at my son's christening in 1988: we're both wearing that style of dress, in tiny calico prints. A younger friend cracked in amazement: "Sister wives!" (Selden)
DeleteThe floral print I chose was similar in size to the McCall pattern on the left. Not subtle at all. And the colours I chose did not work for me. Again, SMH (shaking my head) about why I chose that fabric.
DeleteI totally remember those dresses Grace. How sweet of your mom to make it for you in. spite of her reservations. It was perfect for you at that time!
DeleteGrace , it’s sad that it wasn’t a good fit for you but I can understand why you chose it, it is a beautiful dress.
DeleteGrace, wearing it with confidence was the key, despite its unsuitability. Bet your big smiles made everyone ignore the dress!
DeleteWe all had flowers and ruffles at that era, Grace. My mom was convinced I still liked flowery things years alter!
DeleteThat was completely the style at the time! You can’t look back and judge yourself based on that! If you loved it, you loved it. And we all looked like that.
DeleteI stood out at that awards ceremony in ways that make me cringe.
DeleteAll your positive comments are making me feel better about wearing this dress.
Thanks!
I had Laura Ashley dresses that I loved, Grace! And my daughter and I--she must have been five or six--had matching Laura Ashley jumpsuits. They were adorable, and one fashion choice I don't regret.
DeleteIt took me quite a while before I figured out what my style was. Once I went to a gala wearing a ball gown and the photographer (a lady) discreetly informed me that my bra was showing. Oops! After that I made sure that the color of the bra and my ballgown matched so even if the bra showed, it would look like it was part of the ballgown.
ReplyDeleteSomeone’s story about high school graduation day reminded me of my school days. At that time we were Not allowed to wear shorts, except while playing sports like tennis. Though I did not have a punk hairdo, I remember plucking my eyebrows in a pencil thin line. Big mistake!
At least eyebrows grow back, Diana!
DeleteUnless you ignore your mother, as I did, and keep plucking them. Then you get to an age where they seem like they are nonexistent! Aarrgh! — Pat S
DeletePat S, oh dear. I remember a story about Lana turner not being able to grow her eyebrows or was it someone else?
DeleteRhys, eyebrows do grow back as it did in my case.
Since I cannot wear Black with my fair skin coloring, I opt for navy blue which is so dark that it looks as if it could be black. When I was required to wear a black dress, I would either wear a bright colored scarf in blue or green Or wear midnight blue color.
ReplyDeleteI’m like you. Look awful in black but find in navy blue
DeleteI prefer to wear navy rather than black too.
DeleteAbout ten years ago, my weight was way up and I wore an unfortunate jacket in too-hot pink with a black dress to the Malice banquet. I was nominated for an Agatha Award and frankly am kind of glad I didn't win that year so everybody's eyes weren't on me. I still cringe at the photos.
ReplyDeleteDebs, anything goes when you're pregnant. I'm an inch shorter and gained 55 lbs with my first. I made a pair of red maternity overalls and wore them. Talk about the walking beach ball!
I never remember you looking bad, Edith!
DeleteYou are sweet to say that, Rhys.
DeleteI think overalls would have been cute, Edith. At least more so than the pink velour track suit!
DeleteI've always chosen clothes in Early Unobtrusive -- almost always dark solid colors, or if a print, a very small or faint one. I can't imagine having the confidence for the outfits described above. You all are great. (Selden)
ReplyDeleteI love this: "Early Unobtrusive" - that's generally my fashion statement, too!
DeleteI love these stories and have plenty of my own. The biggest faux pas happens when you fall in love with one sweater, like I did in college, and wear it day after day because you feel great in it and you hear someone say, "Doesn't she ever wash it?" Oh, bo.
ReplyDeleteI don’t think we did wash things much in college! Never had money for the washing machine and nowhere to dry hand washes
DeleteAs a male, I can't go wrong with a 1970s leisure suit and super, super wide ties. Prove me wrong.
ReplyDeleteWell, as long as the leisure suit is pale beige, Jerry. And the ties are LOUD.
DeleteI sold a few pale blue leisure suits when I worked in the suits department at Meier and Frank in the summer of 1975. Pale blue polyester.
DeleteMy mom remarried for the first time in 1975. Stepdad Don was a super flashy dresser, whose theory of clothing is "why be dull when you can be colorful?" As soon as spring came he pulled out the white shoes and matching white belt, to go with his Kelly green pants and pale blue shirt, or his red pants and pink shirt. He was the peacock in their relationship.
DeleteHa ha ha, Jerry. My husband, the family's Golden Boy, was dressed in Brooks Brothers by his anxious parents until he escaped their control. Thereafter he had a decidedly rebellious attitude toward clothing. Not knowing any of this, I met him in 1983 at work. He was an athlete, very handsome. We had a dress-up occasion for our job and I couldn't wait to see him in something other than jeans. For this great occasion he appeared in a blue polyester striped shirt with a huge collar and clashing polyester plaid pants. My eyes bled! I discovered that he had worked as a summer cop on Martha's Vineyard in 1974 and had picked up some clothes for $1 each at a sidewalk sale. (Selden)
DeleteFirst day, first year university, and coming from a very small town, where I was extremely shy and extremely short. 1967. Bright colours and fluorescent everything was the style of the time, as well as bell bottom jeans and jean jackets. I didn’t wear jeans.
ReplyDeleteMy mother thought I would look good in an eye-watering bright pink with lime and orange giant polka dots. Cut to look like a giant triangle – perfect tent. It was made of some kind of perma-starched poplin so it never ‘softened’. Short - the only part of it that I liked. I have no idea what I wore on my feet to complete the outfit, but I know it was not go-go boots tho they were the style at the time.
I looked an idiot!
That took some courage to wear, Margo!
DeleteI NEED a picture of this.
DeleteLike Hallie, I've always been a fairly conservative dresser. Heck, I bought my first scarf in eighth grade, 60 years ago! And like Hank and Jenn and Rhys, I had (operative word here, sigh) a tallish, willowy figure back in the day, which makes it easier to carry off styles like jumpsuits. I've never had the thighs for hot pants, thank goodness.
ReplyDeleteThe biggest embarrassment in clothing I can think of was going to a very elegant party, and meeting my friend's interior designer boss for the first time at his home. He came to the door and took my coat, whereupon I accidentally opened the surplice wrap top of my sheer, floral dress--and exposed my bra. Pat is a lovely man, and he and his partner Terry became dear friends (Terry, tragically, being the first man in Cincinnati to die of AIDS later). But we laughed about that dramatic introduction for years.
Oops! Thank heavens he wasn’t the type to take that as an invitation!
DeleteWell, he's gay. And horrified! LOL
DeleteI love these stories so much! I know I have had and worn more than my share of hideous clothes, but that one that stands out is the crinoline I got for my birthday in seventh grade. Living rurally, all our shopping was done by catalog and my eyes feasted on a certain crinoline. 75 yards of net! I think the yardage was measured at the hem, which was ruffled of course. It was mint green. If you seen square dancers, it is exactly the sort of thing they wear. It was wonderful with a tiny exception - I had nothing full enough to wear over it, so I was constantly trying to pull my skirt down to cover it. Then after sever weeks I noticed that the heel of my shoe kept getting caught in the binding of the hem and ripping it so that it hung down. Honestly I have no idea how my teacher was able to look at me and keep a straight face.
ReplyDeleteYou wore it to school? I had one for my Sunday best. Very scratchy!
DeleteYep, school was my social time, but I probably wore it to Sunday school too. Very scratchy indeed, which is probably why the edges had binding.
DeleteJudi, it is my belief, that teachers are trained not to see and surely not to mention things that embarrass their students. Elisabeth
DeleteElisabeth, you might very well be right, becuase years later, after he had become principal he offered me a very nice summer teaching job, head teacher in fact.
DeleteI proudly made myself a lavender polyester hot pants outfit when I was in high school. It was a brocaded pattern of two shades and the tunic had a wide slit in the front. I wore it with lavender pantyhose,
ReplyDeleteI bet you looked fabulous!
DeleteRhys, I see your green tights and raise them to ORANGE. Yes, first day of school going into 8th grade. I had a long-sleeved polyester dress in brown with orange trim and orange tights to go with. I think the entire bus was shocked into silence as I walked down the sidewalk to the bus. It was September and a very hot day, so basically I cooked in that dress. As far as I can remember, I threw the tights away, never to be seen again. I couldn't afford to throw the dress away, but, believe me, brown is not and has never been a flattering color for me and I have my school picture to prove it.
ReplyDeleteAt least they were fall colors, Flora. You looked like a large leaf floating down the sidewalk
DeleteI'm having lots of fun picturing everyone in their outfits, some of which don't sound as bad as you all think they were. Here's my memory: We moved from Puerto Rico to Vancouver in 1969, and I did my last two years of high school there and graduated. For the 1971 prom, I wore a long, very bright pumpkin-colored kaftan-style dress with a front zipper, very tight (in those days, I had the best figure I've ever had!), with a vast hood lined with psychedelic black and white fabric hanging down my back. I had much longer hair then, and I had it afro-ed so that it stood straight up in a big ball around my head. When I arrived with my date, Rob, who had decided to rent tails instead of a tux or a suit, I found that almost all the other girls had on pastel ball dresses. I had a moment of thinking, "Holy shit," and then I decided I liked the way I looked, and I just went with it. I'm SURE I couldn't have handled it if I hadn't been with Rob, and he hadn't looked different, too. And, I should add, very handsome!
ReplyDeleteIt would have been perfect for Hogwarts ball!
DeleteYes, there was definitely a Halloween costume vibe to the outfit, Rhys!
DeleteI'll be everyone looked boring compared to you, Kim!
DeleteThanks, Debs!
DeleteThe only "What was I thinking?" outfit I can think of for me was one I didn't even pick.
ReplyDeleteBack in the days of yore, when I wasn't a big tub of goo, I took gymnastics for a few years. Well, they would put on recitals once a year. And the year I remember was when I had to do the recital in an electric neon lime green outfit!
Hideous doesn't even begin to describe this thing. In fact, if I'd turned out to be a serial killer I'm sure one look at the photo of me in that outfit would've won me an acquittal.
There is a surviving photo of it but if it ever goes into public arena, my sister has been informed that I will indeed find a secret place to bury her body. :D LOL
I’m trying to picture it, Jay. But if you were good at gymnastics you could wear any color!
DeleteLOL!!! I may have to pay your sister a visit.
DeleteI don't remember wearing any bad outfits but the reason is my mother had wonderful fashion sense - she had worked for a famous French fashion designer in LA when she was in her 20's. She would sew our clothes and I received many compliments. I still remember a lot of the clothes she made and it brings back fond memories.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I don't have my mothers fashion sense (sad to say) and as an adult now - it shows!!!
I tend to wear pretty much the same boring clothes - jeans or stretch pants (with zipper pockets for my phone), random t-shirts, and sweat shirts highlighting my grandkids' schools.
Happy Passover to those celebrating!
You were so lucky to have a mother who sewed and knew about fashion. You must have been the envy in high school
DeleteI'm like Hallie. I'm so conservative that I never really wore outrageous clothes. And The Girl was always very honest about her opinions when I shopped, so she kept me in line.
ReplyDeleteBut I do remember a denim mini skirt from my high school days. Of course, back then I would have looked good in it.
I had a short denim skirt I wore in my running days - in my mid forties. Alas, no more.
DeleteEdith, my mother hated that skirt. She thought it was "trampy." I was 16 and had great legs. I didn't care. Mom always bought be long, full skirts that were more appropriate for women twice my age. Sigh. You can imagine how THAT went over in a high school hallway.
DeleteRhys, I think the green outfit would have been stunning among that sea of black dresses. I’ll bet all those women were thinking they wished they looked that stunning and had the courage to wear something other than black!
ReplyDeleteI was just thinking about this the other day. I wore an awful dress to my sophomore semi formal in high school. It was light blue with pink flowers, puffy short sleeves, a scoop neck with lace. Needless to say my mother helped me pick it out. It was very “Little House on the Prairie.” And there are no remaining pictures of me in it. Thankfully
I am so sorry I missed this conversation, everyone! Most of my "what was I thinking" apparel has been shoes. I love cute or sexy or interesting shoes, but I'm difficult to fit - I have a VERY wide ball, normal sized heel, a HIGH instep and a tendency to plantar fasciitis. I have bought SO many pairs of shoes that felt good - for five minutes in the store. And then worn them to occasions or places where I am in agony the whole time.
ReplyDeleteThese days my only goal is absolute comfort without, hopefully, looking like I'm wearing medically prescribed orthopedics.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve taken my shoes off under a banquet table, Julia. I learned years ago to be comfortable. I’ll never be Hank!
DeleteNow I’ll never be Hank either. During my salad days as a fashion model, I was able to wear high heels with lots of practice. No problem. These days I cannot wear high heels.
DeleteI have yet to see an image of you Rhys, where I think. oh dear. You are a role model.
ReplyDeleteI try to avoid fashion goofs by hiding behind bland clothes and dark colors; until recently. Now almost 80 years old, I have decided to say "invoke the rainbow, ADD COLOR!" I now have a collection of tropical tops and wear t-shirts with a message. My most memorable cringe involved a Gala event for the Oregon Museum of Science and Industry back in the 1970s. I was a young mother on a tight family budget and went to the event wearing my best pantsuit (daywear for business) only to find gowns and more gowns. Heaven help me, the POTUS was the guest of honor. I hid.
I would have hid too!
DeleteQueen Elizabeth II wore bright colors too
DeleteI still cringe when I remember the strapless bright yellow chiffon dress I wore to my high school senior prom. It swished when I walked but the worst part was the too, which was shaped for breasts much larger than my little ones, and stood out away from my meagre chest. Pathetic.
ReplyDeleteSuch fun reading everyone's stories! I do sometimes wonder how I was left behind the door when the fashion gene was given out, but I think some of it is because of being short. It's really hard to make an elegant fashion splash when you're 5'2"!
ReplyDeleteI got married in 1972 in the Age of Polyester. It was a home wedding and my two younger sisters were the bridesmaids. I found my dress on the sale rack for August clothes, a short ivory polyester dress with bronze embroidery on the front. At the mall (on the sales racks) I found two dresses of pastel colors, also polyester, that did for my sisters. Also fashionably short. When I look at wedding pictures of us, all I see are legs. Long legs and short dresses.
ReplyDeleteI bet you were so cute!
DeleteFrom Judy Kidder Browning. Not so much a faux pas as totally clueless. In college I went to see the musical Hair in Los Angeles. Hair, you know, hippies, nudity (gasp), etc. And there I was in my That Girl flip and bangs, in my grey dirndl skirt with my long-sleeved, high collar white lace blouse. Might as well have been a neon sign blinking SQUARE on and off. P.S. Thanks to everybody for the laughs today.
ReplyDeleteI saw it too I can’t say the nudes looked too attractive. Also nice been to a nude beach. Revolting!
DeleteThat wrap around skirt I wore when middle school age. I was trying to impress the boy next door. I wa outside in the back yard and when this boy looked my way the skirt fell off. No slip underneath
ReplyDeleteThat got his attention!
DeleteYou must have been horrified!!
DeleteI loved the UK version of What Not to Wear - it focused on what shapes looked good on your body type and was such an education on why some days I thought I looked fab and other days were a miss. All of those mock turtlenecks that made me look like my boobs were growing out of my stomach when I should only wear scoop-necked tops.
ReplyDeleteI had one dress back in ‘93 that was made out of what I now recognize as upholstery fabric. Luckily it was cream and taupe, so not too obnoxious, but I wore that to multiple weddings that year.
My wardrobe is much like Hallie’s, conservative, so nothing outlandish to embarrass me. Never had or needed a wardrobe large enough to go through on a regular basis. One wardrobe regret, never had the bosom to hold up a strapless or spaghetti strapped dress…sigh. Great Monday topic, Rhys. Elisabeth
ReplyDeleteI sewed my own dress for my ten year high school reunion. It was very cute blue and white cotton print dress with short blue jacket and a wide white elasticy belt. The perfect light blue from our Navy and blue school colors.
ReplyDeleteEveryone else in some version of the little black dress or some sparkley cocktail dress of some sort. Took me right back to the nerdy girl I was in high school.
But you sewed yours. You have skills they don’t have. And it was right for you! Brsva
DeleteThe talk about jean skirts reminded me of a brown leather skirt and vest I had at the beginning of high school. Probably not real leather, but I loved it dearly. I know it was the beginning of high school because by the end of high school, the skirts were much shorter than it was. I've always thought what a non sequitur the giirls' fashions were in high school. We were finally wearing pants to school at the same time the mini-skirt was catching on. The dress I most regret choosing to wear was a flowered print one to one of my niece's weddings. In the family wedding pictures, everyone else is in a solid color, and there I am like a giant flower bouquet, sticking out like a sore thumb.
ReplyDeleteI bet you loved the dress at the time:)
Delete